As is commonly known, Twilight and Forever Dawn were originally not written for publication. When Stephenie Meyer (SM) took Twilight and the first half (roughly) for Forever Dawn to Little Brown (LB), she was told that Twilight would work well in the Young Adult (YA) genre, but Forever Dawn would not, and that she needed to write the story to keep Bella in high school longer ("The biggest non-YA thing I'd done with Forever Dawn was this: I'd pretty much passed over the rest of Bella's high school experience entirely, skipping ahead to a time in her life with more mature themes."1 (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | New Moon | The Story)). So, SM wrote the story to finish out Bella's senior year of high school at the same time she was editing Twilight. By the time she was done, there was two more books of material, and it would take a fourth book to tell the story in Forever Dawn, which SM had completed shortly after negotiating the contract. SM requested a contract for a fourth book, but was told she should come up with an ending for the series at the end of the third book. She came up with an ending for Eclipse, but was not happy with it and could not let go of the idea of finishing the story with Renesmee, who she had created in Forever Dawn ("Um, actually, Nessie was one of the reasons that Breaking Dawn exists...This was a very hard fought battle and I was fighting for Nessie the whole time. She was a character that I was not going to allow her to be destroyed. She had to exist. So, she was in my Forever Dawn.") After Twilight and New Moon were published and the series was clearly a success, she and her agent went back to LB, and negotiated for a fourth book. She says she was asked: "Can you make an ending that you're happy with?' And I said `no, I can't make an ending that I'm happy with.'" (www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Chicago Q&A). My theory is that the alternate ending was completely different than that of Breaking Dawn (BD). When asked "What made you decide to do the pregnancy story line because it seems kind of far from where the characters seem to be heading." she stated:
"I have heard that and let me tell you in new moon2 and eclipse, with one exception, every plot line, every moment is heading towards what happens in breaking dawn. I knew exactly where it was going and all the hints are actually in there. You kind of have to dig for them but every thing that happens happens for this reason. The one exception is actually the back story of the Quileutes. That was something I that wrote when there was this possibility that I was going to be forced into this 3 book thing which I didn't see how I could do an ending I liked. I came up with an alternate ending that, I had, I kind of get a kick out of it. It was a little different. I don't think anyone else would have liked it; my mom hates it. But he Quileute back story indirectly leads into that. So that's really the only part that wasn't focused on this ending." (www.twilightlexiconblog.com: Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Los Angeles Q&A ).
However, there are undeniably vestiges of the fact the series was once headed for a different conclusion.3
SM has said that she may, someday, put that ending on her website (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | Eclipse | FAQ). I would bet that, in that ending, Bella stays human (I really doubt that SM would turn her into a vampire before she became a mother), but Edward's soul ends up with Jacob's body.4 Bella gets both Edward and Jacob. Does that story line sound a little familiar? Kind of like, The Host? Stephenie writes about The Host here (www.teenreads.com: Author Profile | Stephenie Meyer | Author Talk):
"The kernel of thought that became THE HOST was inspired by absolute boredom. I was driving from Phoenix to Salt Lake City, through some of the most dreary and repetitive desert in the world. It's a drive I've made many times, and one of the ways I keep from going insane is by telling myself stories. I have no idea what sparked the strange foundation of a body-snatching alien in love with the host body's boyfriend over the host-body's protest. I was halfway into the story before I realized it. Once I got started, though, the story immediately demanded my attention. I could tell there was something compelling in the idea of such a complicated triangle. I started writing the outline in a notebook, and then fleshed it out as soon as I got to a computer. THE HOST was supposed to be no more than a side project --- something to keep me busy between editing stints on ECLIPSE --- but it turned into something I couldn't step away from until it was done."
So, shortly after the release of New Moon SM has the go ahead to write the fourth book and change the direction of the series back to the original scenario of Forever Dawn. The fans had been expressing their desire to see Bella as a vampire, so subtle changes had been made to New Moon to go in that direction. There was time to rework Eclipse, and the best way to do that would be to write BD simultaneously, to make sure the story flowed as much as it could into the changed direction. But, no, SM was distracted by her new project, and so Eclipse came off sounding like it was still headed in the original direction. Yes, the imprinting thing was put in, and a few other things that foreshadowed the events in BD. And, she may still have pulled it off, except that she got so caught up in The Host that she never even started BD until the fall of 2007, three months before she was supposed to have it done. She didn't have time to do it right. I wouldn't have liked it regardless, but it was way obvious to a lot of fans the BD wasn't was it was supposed to be. Instead of writing a new book with some of the events in Forever Dawn that followed through on the first three books, SM took Forever Dawn and tried to adapt it. Just didn't work for any astute reader. We all saw through it. In order to successfully end a series that had introduced many characters and plotlines during the timeframe that had originally been left out, BD needed the time and thought that The Host got instead.
Twilight Series Timeline
June 2, 2003: SM's dream inspires Twilight (www.stepheniemeyer.com: StephenieMeyer.com | Twilight Series | Twilight). She writes the book, with the intent of stopping at the end of one book: "...Twilight was just going to be one book and I wasn’t thinking about sequels, Bella and Edward got engaged at the end of Twilight and were headed off toward their happily ever after...5(www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Seattle Q & A)
September 1, 2003: (approximately) Twilight completed (StephenieMeyer.com | Twilight Series | Twilight), Forever Dawn started (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | New Moon | The Story).
December 1, 2003: (approximately): Twilight accepted for publication ("And that's how, in the course of six months, Twilight was dreamed, written, and accepted for publication." (StephenieMeyer.com | Twilight Series | Twilight). The contract with the publisher is for a trilogy that ends with some or all of the storyline for Forever Dawn, which started off with Bella and Edward getting married. ("I had Twilight and I showed them what I was working on for Forever Dawn and they said ‘you know, we’d really like to keep Bella in high school for a little bit longer, develop that more, keep it more YA.’ And I said ‘Ok, there are some interesting stories to do in there.'" www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Chicago Q&A ).
February 2004: Forever Dawn completed ("The rough draft of Breaking Dawn, which you guys know is Forever Dawn, I was finished around February of 2004" www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Chicago Q&A ). It was not intended for publication and given to SM's sister. (StephenieMeyer.com | Twilight Series | Twilight | FAQ). However, once the book was finished, SM became convinced the series should end with the same events having taken place.
February 2004-March 2005 (approximately) Twilight edited, story between the events of Twilight and Forever Dawn developed "I was writing New Moon and editing Twilight simultaneously. So, when Jacob Black started taking over New Moon, I was able to go back and weave Jacob and Billy throughout Twilight more centrally." (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | New Moon | The Story).
March 2005-October 2005: (approximately) Work on New Moon and Eclipse continues. (in the Borders Book Club interview, Chapter 6, SM stated that the rough draft of Eclipse was complete by the time Twilight was released). Wrapping up the series with the Forever Dawn events will require a fourth book. A scenario for ending the series at Eclipse is developed and the Quilluette back-story is written to set up for it, but the ending will require another six chapters.
October 5, 2005: Twilight released. SM is still refering to the series as a trilogy (Interview: Twilight Author Stephenie Meyer).
Late 2005-Early, 2006 (approximately): SM determined to write fourth book "I have no intention of quitting at three. Firstly, Bella and Edward would never forgive me. Secondly, the next two books would have to be 1000+ pages apiece to get the story to any place that felt like a true resolution. Thirdly, there are other stories to tell here, and, though the narrator might change6, the story will continue. I just have way too much fun living in Forks (in my head) to stop anytime soon." (StephenieMeyer.com | Twilight Series | Twilight | FAQ)New Moon revised, possibly to set up for the "Breaking Dawn" ending. Revisions: www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | New Moon | Outakes7) SM pushes LB for a contract for a fourth book, but she is still an unproven author (EW Exclusive: Stephenie Meyer Reveals a Spoiler), and the editors respond: "we’d just really just like it to be three books, and end with Eclipse." (www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Chicago Q & A ).
Mid-February through Mid-April 2006 Personal Correspondence (PC) between Alphie and SM. The PCs are eventually published on the Lexicon.8 Inconsistencies9 from the story are due to the changes in storyline between Forever Dawn and the subsequent direction the story took. (www.breakingdonnas.com: Twilight Lexicon Forums, April 15, 2007: "People are going to pick apart every line I write for inconsistencies, which of course will exist, because I am not infallible. Sigh.")
August 21, 2006: New Moon released.
Fall, 2006: LB enters into new contract for BD. New Moon extras written.
Late 2006 through Early 2007 (approximately): Eclipse written/revised.
February, 2007: SM tells members of Crepuscelo in Spain that she would eventually write the six chapter alternate ending for Eclipse and post it on her website. (www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Q&A Session in Spain with the Members of Crepusculo.)
Spring, 2007: Work on The Host takes place while Eclipse is edited.
Late Spring 2007: Rough draft of The Host completed and put out for publisher's bids. LB wins publishing rights.
Summer 2007: The Host edited. (MySpace.com-Stephenie, July 8, 2007, "I was slogging away finishing The Host edit.")
August 7, 2007: Eclipse released.
September-December, 2007: BD written and completed days before Christmas. (MySpace.com-Stephenie, December 22, 2007, "(A)round 1:20 a.m., I finally finished the rough draft of Breaking Dawn") LB announces The Host will be released on May 6, 2008.
Mid-January 2008: The Host final edits completed.
January 22, 2008: Major edit of BD begins: Twilight Moms.
February 6, 2008: LB announces that BD would be released on August 2, 2008.
1By "non-YA", SM meant marriage of the main characters, which does not fit into the YA concept. I know of no credible documentation that clearly indicates that LB objected to publishing the content of Forever Dawn, but, to be consistent with the YA format, the marriage theme should not have occured until the end of the series ("They wouldn't have let me get away with Breaking Dawn as a YA novel if it was the first book in the series. But pretty much nobody argues with me these days. And I'm not talking about smut (sorry! I know that disappoints), I'm talking more about adult issues that go along with (some of) the characters growing up."(Twilight Moms)), which was to be a trilogy. However, had LB not advised SM to come up with an alternate ending at the time she entered into the contract for the trilogy, they did later when SM wrote three books worth of material leading to the events in Forever Dawn and requested a contract for a fourth book.
2According to the www.TwilightLexicon.com About Stephenie Meyer, it was after the release of New Moon that the book deal expanded from three to four. So, if New Moon was setting up for Breaking Dawn, it had to be subtle.
3One vestige is the fact that the characters "Jane" and "Alec" are child vampires in the Volturi. They were introduced in New Moon. Later in the series, in BD, much of the plot centers around the prohibition against child vampires. SM had to provide an explanation after the publication of New Moon www.twilightlexiconblog.com: Lexicon Personal Correspondence #10 (September 19, 2006): "Alec is Jane’s twin brother. (I will not tell you what his gift is, only that it is more potent in battle than hers. He is one of the main reasons that the Volturi guard is invincible.) They were burned at the stake for witchcraft when Aro stepped in. (By "stepped in" I mean "slaughtered the whole village," of course). Aro already had his eye on these two, but he wanted to let them age before he took them. The villagers forced his hand, which sort of pissed him off."
4A compelling indication of this is the references to Edward's soul on pages 37, 69 and 518 of New Moon, a plotline that was dropped later in the series.
5My guess is, at the end of the original Twilight, Bella is a vampire due to James's bite, and the first chapter is Forever Dawn is her waking up in hospital, to find out that her transformation was a dream, because Edward had sucked the venom out allowing the story to continue on to the birth of Renesmee. Twilight is an allegory for the Mormon concept of the "Celestial Kingdom" in which the male partner becomes a God after death, and his wife is his eternal partner. (MORMON VAMPIRES: THE TWILIGHT SAGA AND RELIGIOUS LITERACY)The missing element was the ability to procreate. SM could not give up the themes of eternal marriage and procreation, and insisted upon ending the series with both elements.
6"I would have to say, the most likely narrators going forward in the future are Nessie and Leah." (www.twilightlexiconblog.com: The Breaking Dawn Concert Tour-Chicago Q&A)
7In the(Borders Book Club interview, Chapter 3), SM states that she didn't come up with concept of the Quiluettes being "werewolves" until she wrote Forever Dawn. In the original draft of New Moon, the Quiluettes are not identified as "werewolves" until the very last line in the book, a line about which SM states she: "still has a soft spot for" (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | New Moon | Outakes). The line is Edward asking Bella: "Do you mind washing your hair? You absolutely reek of werewolf". But, at the end of BD, the "werewolves" are revealed to really be "shape-shifters", leading me to think that that is what they were in Forever Dawn. However, since "shape-shifter" wouldn't have work well in the original last line, and because of SM's desire to play off on the legendary enimity of werewolves and vampires, the nature of the Quiluette's form was changed in New Moon, and had to be carried through in Eclipse and most of BD, where, seemingly out of the blue, it went back to shape-shifter.
8There is a misconception that the Lexicon is owned by SM. It isn't, nor does it represent her personally. It's co-owned by the site adminstrators, Lori Jeffs and Laurie Byrne-Christiano:
9www.twilightlexiconblog.com: Lexicon Personal Correspondence #4 (March 11, 2006): Q: How do the Cullens forge all the necessary paperwork - i.e. birth certs, past school records, etc.? A: They buy them off skilled forgers. At the present time, Jasper has a contact in Seattle. www.twilightlexiconblog.com: Lexicon Personal Correspondence #8 (April 10, 2006): Q: Is there any more information you can give us about the Cullen house? A: Something to remember, these rooms are ginormous. This is a really BIG house. Also, there’s a lot of unaccounted for space on the third floor euphemistically dubbed the “library.” This is where they do things that are technically illegal–like document forgery and computer hackery and all kinds of other shady stuff.
The first is consistent with Forever Dawn when Bella visits Jenks to get passports for Jake and Renesmee, the second with page 421 in New Moon where Alice says: "Please tell me you have a passport. I don't have time to forge one." SM should have left out the whole Jenks thing in BD. It was in Forever Dawn (www.stepheniemeyer.com: Twilight Series | Breaking Dawn | FAQ: "The last chapter ends the same way, but there is an epilogue. It involves Max (J. Jenk's assistant). Bella's initial interaction with him is a little bit longer and, feeling she owes him a favor, she gives him her number and tells him she will help him out in return if he ever needs a favor of his own. Max gets himself into some trouble, and Bella gets to play Superman.") but it no longer worked in BD. It made no sense, after extending the timeline with New Moon and Eclipse, that Bella would have had no idea about how the Cullen's managed to document their lives (or that there was a cottage in back of their house, or that they owned an island in South America).
Monday, September 7, 2009
Saturday, February 28, 2009
The Consumation (Fan-Fic)
After driving all night and the next day after our wedding, Bella and I arrived right after sundown at the village near our honeymoon spot one fourth the way down the Baja Peninsula in Mexico. I had spent hours on the internet and phone finding the perfect situation; a private location on a beach where I could spend time in the sun with Bella without worrying about being spotted by other humans. In the end, I had to pay for four cottages at the end of a private road with a locked gate to ensure the requisite seclusion. But Bella wanted a honeymoon in a warm, sunny place, and since money was no object, it was no problem to bribe the property manager to find other arrangements for the vacationers that had already reserved two of the bungalows.
We found the address of the property manager; he escorted us to the cottages and showed us which one had been stocked with the perishable groceries I had requested. He inquired when the rest of our party would arrive and take up residence in the other three cabins. I told him they would be arriving at different times over the next week, and that we would make arrangements to meet them so that he would not have to escort them in himself. I explained to him that we did not want anyone to disturb us during our two week stay, and he agreed that he or his maintenance crew would only come by after being requested to do so. After he did, I walked back to the Land Rover I had leased, both for this trip and for Bella to drive until her wedding gift from Rosalie, a total renovation of her truck done mostly by Rosalie herself, was complete. I rummaged through the cartons in the back and took out a thick chain and heavy padlock, and ran back to the gate and ensured our wishes would be abided by.
When I got back, Bella had changed into her sweats and was lying on the bed asleep. I wasn't surprised, the events leading up to the wedding and the ensuing 20-plus hour drive in the tightly packed Land Rover had exhausted her. I let her sleep and unloaded the Land Rover. I checked on her again, and decided to hunt the desert dwelling deer that roamed this part of Mexico. I wrote a note on a tablet and left it on the bed next to Bella in case she should wake up, jumped in the Land Rover and headed into the desert hills.
I got back just before sunrise, pleased with my success. Bella was still asleep so I unpacked the provisions Alice and I had packed; Bella's favorite foods, new clothes that Alice had picked out for her, plus a few other things I thought would be necessary or handy. I went back in the bedroom, where Bella was stirring. I lay down next to her, and gently stroked her cheek. She woke up, looked at me and smiled. Then, she noticed the room was light, and sat up. "How long have I been asleep?" "All night" I replied. "Well crap! I'm sorry! Here we are on our honeymoon, and all I do is sleep!" "You were tired" I replied. "I was glad you slept, after that long drive". She looked into my eyes, noticing how light they were. "What did you find to hunt around here?" "Well, I went looking for deer" I responded, "I'd read they were here, but hard to find. Now I know why. There are a lot of mountain lions around." I grinned at her and she shook her head and got up and went into the bathroom.
While she was in there, I brought out a couple of packages I had packed, and stripped down the bed. I put on a heated mattress pad and electric blanket, turned them on then remade the bed. When she came out, she looked a little uncertain as to what to do next. I decided not to rush things, and asked if she wanted some breakfast. She agreed, and we went into the small kitchen where I poured her favorite cereal in a bowl and set it on the table with some milk from the refridgerator. I sat down across from her, watching her eat, wishing I could be the one who, in a few short weeks would be the one to change, to become human instead of having Bella give up her humanity. I would pay any price to be sitting across from her, eating cereal every morning.
When she finished, I suggested we go out and check out the beach. It was already getting hot; the cottage had no air conditioning but relied on open windows and the ocean breeze blowing through for cooling. I opened the windows while Bella changed from her sweats to a bathing suit and shorts. I put on something I'd never worn before: swim trunks. As a young human, I wore the typical suits of my time on my human family's summer trips to the shores of Lake Michigan, they were ridiculous-looking things that looked like the skivvies I wore during the winter, only with lower legs and arms cut off. As a vampire, I never swam or sunbathed. Even though it is a myth that the sun burns vampires, we still avoid it. Although the diamond like facets in our skin reflect the burning UV rays, we still become uncomfortably warm. If we get too warm, our strength saps.
We walked out on the beach, and I immediately became self-conscience of the glow I was putting off. Bella had never seen me so exposed in the sun before. She must have felt my tension, and reached for my hand. We walked down to the water's edge and let it lap up over our feet. "Do you want to get in" I asked her. "Not really, not now anyway" she said. "I'd just like to sit here and watch the water for a while". I ran back to the cottage for a blanket, and we laid it out on the dry sand. I had also brought out a bottle of sun-block for my nearly-albino wife, and began spreading it on her, her legs, her back, then letting my hands glide over her shoulders, rubbing it over her chest. As I massaged sun block into parts of her body I had never touched before, I felt a stirring that I had always repressed, but between the sun weakening me and my anticipation for what I knew was going to occur eventually during the honeymoon, I gave into it. Bella too was reacting to my touch. Her breaths were coming quicker and shallower and her heart was beating faster. I turned her to face me, and we kissed as passionately as possible with me being careful to not cut her with my teeth. My hands came up over her back, hooked the bathing suit straps, and pulled them down over her shoulders. I then did something I had always wanted but never dared to; touched her breasts. She closed her eyes and sank into me. I worried for a moment she had fainted, but was instead giving into the pleasure of the sensation. I felt ready to take her right then and there, but felt too vulnerable out there in the open. I got uo to my feet, extended my hand and helped Bella to hers. "Let's go to the bedroom" I whispered. She looked at me with an expression so longing that it almost scared me. Would I be able to do this? I closed my eyes, kissed her again and began to feel very weak. Was it the sun, or was it emotion, fear combined with longing, overcoming me? Regardless, I needed to get to the cottage. I led her back and we entered the bedroom.
The momentum of the events on the beach had been disrupted, and we were unsure how to recreate it. Bella put her arms around me, then stepped back, startled "You're warmer, and...softer" she said. "Must be all the sun" I muttered, as she squeezed my arm, and instead of the expected rock-hardness, it flexed under the pressure. "The sun?" she answered "But the sun doesn't hurt you." "No, but it still affects me. The warmth. Like plastic gets soft when it's warm". "You never told me" she said accusingly. "These are things I'm going to have to know". I winced. I hadn't told her a lot of things she should know. I didn't like to talk about her becoming a vampire. I loved her as she was.
Now that the mood was thoroughly disrupted, she pulled up her bathing suit and walked into the bathroom. I sat on the warm bed, despondant. A few minutes later, however, she walked out, wearing a short silk robe that Alice must have bought for her, since it was not something Bella would buy for herself. She walked up to me, sat on my lap wrapping her arms and legs around me, and began kissing me. The mood was instantly restored, and I slipped my hands in and under the robe to find out what was beneath. Nothing. Her hands worked their way to my trunks and untied the draw string. I stood while holding her, still feeling a little weak, and the trunks fell down to my ankles. I pulled back the covers on the bed, lay her down on it, and stepped out of the trunks and into an unforgettable experience.
We found the address of the property manager; he escorted us to the cottages and showed us which one had been stocked with the perishable groceries I had requested. He inquired when the rest of our party would arrive and take up residence in the other three cabins. I told him they would be arriving at different times over the next week, and that we would make arrangements to meet them so that he would not have to escort them in himself. I explained to him that we did not want anyone to disturb us during our two week stay, and he agreed that he or his maintenance crew would only come by after being requested to do so. After he did, I walked back to the Land Rover I had leased, both for this trip and for Bella to drive until her wedding gift from Rosalie, a total renovation of her truck done mostly by Rosalie herself, was complete. I rummaged through the cartons in the back and took out a thick chain and heavy padlock, and ran back to the gate and ensured our wishes would be abided by.
When I got back, Bella had changed into her sweats and was lying on the bed asleep. I wasn't surprised, the events leading up to the wedding and the ensuing 20-plus hour drive in the tightly packed Land Rover had exhausted her. I let her sleep and unloaded the Land Rover. I checked on her again, and decided to hunt the desert dwelling deer that roamed this part of Mexico. I wrote a note on a tablet and left it on the bed next to Bella in case she should wake up, jumped in the Land Rover and headed into the desert hills.
I got back just before sunrise, pleased with my success. Bella was still asleep so I unpacked the provisions Alice and I had packed; Bella's favorite foods, new clothes that Alice had picked out for her, plus a few other things I thought would be necessary or handy. I went back in the bedroom, where Bella was stirring. I lay down next to her, and gently stroked her cheek. She woke up, looked at me and smiled. Then, she noticed the room was light, and sat up. "How long have I been asleep?" "All night" I replied. "Well crap! I'm sorry! Here we are on our honeymoon, and all I do is sleep!" "You were tired" I replied. "I was glad you slept, after that long drive". She looked into my eyes, noticing how light they were. "What did you find to hunt around here?" "Well, I went looking for deer" I responded, "I'd read they were here, but hard to find. Now I know why. There are a lot of mountain lions around." I grinned at her and she shook her head and got up and went into the bathroom.
While she was in there, I brought out a couple of packages I had packed, and stripped down the bed. I put on a heated mattress pad and electric blanket, turned them on then remade the bed. When she came out, she looked a little uncertain as to what to do next. I decided not to rush things, and asked if she wanted some breakfast. She agreed, and we went into the small kitchen where I poured her favorite cereal in a bowl and set it on the table with some milk from the refridgerator. I sat down across from her, watching her eat, wishing I could be the one who, in a few short weeks would be the one to change, to become human instead of having Bella give up her humanity. I would pay any price to be sitting across from her, eating cereal every morning.
When she finished, I suggested we go out and check out the beach. It was already getting hot; the cottage had no air conditioning but relied on open windows and the ocean breeze blowing through for cooling. I opened the windows while Bella changed from her sweats to a bathing suit and shorts. I put on something I'd never worn before: swim trunks. As a young human, I wore the typical suits of my time on my human family's summer trips to the shores of Lake Michigan, they were ridiculous-looking things that looked like the skivvies I wore during the winter, only with lower legs and arms cut off. As a vampire, I never swam or sunbathed. Even though it is a myth that the sun burns vampires, we still avoid it. Although the diamond like facets in our skin reflect the burning UV rays, we still become uncomfortably warm. If we get too warm, our strength saps.
We walked out on the beach, and I immediately became self-conscience of the glow I was putting off. Bella had never seen me so exposed in the sun before. She must have felt my tension, and reached for my hand. We walked down to the water's edge and let it lap up over our feet. "Do you want to get in" I asked her. "Not really, not now anyway" she said. "I'd just like to sit here and watch the water for a while". I ran back to the cottage for a blanket, and we laid it out on the dry sand. I had also brought out a bottle of sun-block for my nearly-albino wife, and began spreading it on her, her legs, her back, then letting my hands glide over her shoulders, rubbing it over her chest. As I massaged sun block into parts of her body I had never touched before, I felt a stirring that I had always repressed, but between the sun weakening me and my anticipation for what I knew was going to occur eventually during the honeymoon, I gave into it. Bella too was reacting to my touch. Her breaths were coming quicker and shallower and her heart was beating faster. I turned her to face me, and we kissed as passionately as possible with me being careful to not cut her with my teeth. My hands came up over her back, hooked the bathing suit straps, and pulled them down over her shoulders. I then did something I had always wanted but never dared to; touched her breasts. She closed her eyes and sank into me. I worried for a moment she had fainted, but was instead giving into the pleasure of the sensation. I felt ready to take her right then and there, but felt too vulnerable out there in the open. I got uo to my feet, extended my hand and helped Bella to hers. "Let's go to the bedroom" I whispered. She looked at me with an expression so longing that it almost scared me. Would I be able to do this? I closed my eyes, kissed her again and began to feel very weak. Was it the sun, or was it emotion, fear combined with longing, overcoming me? Regardless, I needed to get to the cottage. I led her back and we entered the bedroom.
The momentum of the events on the beach had been disrupted, and we were unsure how to recreate it. Bella put her arms around me, then stepped back, startled "You're warmer, and...softer" she said. "Must be all the sun" I muttered, as she squeezed my arm, and instead of the expected rock-hardness, it flexed under the pressure. "The sun?" she answered "But the sun doesn't hurt you." "No, but it still affects me. The warmth. Like plastic gets soft when it's warm". "You never told me" she said accusingly. "These are things I'm going to have to know". I winced. I hadn't told her a lot of things she should know. I didn't like to talk about her becoming a vampire. I loved her as she was.
Now that the mood was thoroughly disrupted, she pulled up her bathing suit and walked into the bathroom. I sat on the warm bed, despondant. A few minutes later, however, she walked out, wearing a short silk robe that Alice must have bought for her, since it was not something Bella would buy for herself. She walked up to me, sat on my lap wrapping her arms and legs around me, and began kissing me. The mood was instantly restored, and I slipped my hands in and under the robe to find out what was beneath. Nothing. Her hands worked their way to my trunks and untied the draw string. I stood while holding her, still feeling a little weak, and the trunks fell down to my ankles. I pulled back the covers on the bed, lay her down on it, and stepped out of the trunks and into an unforgettable experience.
Friday, January 30, 2009
The Most Staggering Inconsistency
Author's note: I originally put this on the Amazon forum, back in 2008.
To start: on her webpage SM says about the cover of Twilight: "In the end, I love the beautiful simplicity of the picture. To me it says: choice." Then in the FAQ for BD she goes on and on about choice. Bella's choices.
Now, look at this article. In it she is quoted:
"It's about keeping yourself free of addictions," she explains, sitting on a huge couch in her living room. "We have free will, which is a huge gift from God. If you tie that up with something like, I don't know, cocaine, then you don't really have a lot of freedom anymore."
Why, oh why, would she go on and on about Bella's "choices" when she has made it very plain in the books that Bella has a VERY addictive personality that takes away her free will? Examples:
Page 283 of Twilight: "It would cause me physical pain to be separated from him now"
Page 292 of Twilight: "It was easier to say in the darkness, knowing as I spoke how my voice would betray me, my hopeless addiction to him"
Page 162 of New Moon: "Maybe I was developing a new kind of sickness, another addiction like the numbness before"
Page 219 of New Moon: "But, I needed Jacob now, needed him like a drug."
Page 352 of New Moon: "I was addicted to the sound of my delusions"
Page 17 of Eclipse: "His touch brought the strangest sense of relief-as if I'd been in pain and the pain had suddenly ceased."
Page 599 of Eclipse "He's like a drug for you Bella"
There's more implicit references in the books, those are just the explicit ones. The point is, Bellas has very little free-will to make choices other than to satisfy her addictions. Her addiction to Edward just outweighed the others. So, why do we keep being told these books are about choice?
Author's Note: There is also some excellent discussion about "choice" in Twilight in this article.
To start: on her webpage SM says about the cover of Twilight: "In the end, I love the beautiful simplicity of the picture. To me it says: choice." Then in the FAQ for BD she goes on and on about choice. Bella's choices.
Now, look at this article. In it she is quoted:
"It's about keeping yourself free of addictions," she explains, sitting on a huge couch in her living room. "We have free will, which is a huge gift from God. If you tie that up with something like, I don't know, cocaine, then you don't really have a lot of freedom anymore."
Why, oh why, would she go on and on about Bella's "choices" when she has made it very plain in the books that Bella has a VERY addictive personality that takes away her free will? Examples:
Page 283 of Twilight: "It would cause me physical pain to be separated from him now"
Page 292 of Twilight: "It was easier to say in the darkness, knowing as I spoke how my voice would betray me, my hopeless addiction to him"
Page 162 of New Moon: "Maybe I was developing a new kind of sickness, another addiction like the numbness before"
Page 219 of New Moon: "But, I needed Jacob now, needed him like a drug."
Page 352 of New Moon: "I was addicted to the sound of my delusions"
Page 17 of Eclipse: "His touch brought the strangest sense of relief-as if I'd been in pain and the pain had suddenly ceased."
Page 599 of Eclipse "He's like a drug for you Bella"
There's more implicit references in the books, those are just the explicit ones. The point is, Bellas has very little free-will to make choices other than to satisfy her addictions. Her addiction to Edward just outweighed the others. So, why do we keep being told these books are about choice?
Author's Note: There is also some excellent discussion about "choice" in Twilight in this article.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
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